Sometimes I think that I have to work harder than most of my fellow stay-at-home moms to enjoy my job. (Or maybe we’re all in the same boat??) The pages of my journals tell that story all too well: I document my efforts to cherish my children while they’re small; I wax poetic about the up sides of staying home; I admit that maybe life as a stay-at-home mom doesn’t come as naturally to me as I had always assumed it would.
I DO love and cherish my children. I find myself overflowing with love—particularly when they’re asleep. 🙂 But I think we can all agree that staying home with small children can kick you in the pants. It can be isolating if you don’t actively fight to get out and socialize. I often fondly remember the days when I was “college smart.” Now, despite numerous hand washings, I feel like the smell of my baby’s stinky diapers clings to my hands. (I think—I hope—that it is in my head!)
As the new year approaches, I am vacillating between accepting that “surviving with a little grace” is an adequate goal or reaching higher for one like “learning to thrive while staying home.” I suppose my goal always has been to learn to thrive (which, incidentally, is a big part of why I keep this blog), but I also realize some weeks, merely making it is okay too.
Thanks for being part of my journey! Are you thriving or surviving?
Oh my goodness Erica, it is like you read my mind and put into words (much more beautifully I must add), what I was thinking. I always thought that being a stay at home mom would be this wonderful and fulfilling experience. I find however, that while I DO love watching my son grow up, it is a bit isolating. I sometimes hate the fact that I spend my days counting down the hours (days, weeks) until daddy comes home instead of relishing the moments with my sweet boy, but it is a goal this year to find joy in the everyday, and make these moments, that I will never get back with my son, truly count. I hope that at some point (sooner rather than later), I will be able to say that I am thriving rather than merely surviving…it is good to know that I am not the only one who needs to work on this.
Your honesty is so refreshing! I often feel like SAHM life does not come naturally to me, and it is discouraging– I guess because I thought it would, and because it seems as though I am the only woman who feels that way. There is definitely some comfort in knowing I'm not the only one! I seem to go through cycles of thriving and surviving, and I think I just need to find peace with however I'm feeling.
Um, I haven't decided yet if I'm thriving or surviving. Maybe 75% of days are thriving, 25% surviving. BUT, my kids are at pretty easy ages I think; having a few toddlers around in a few years will make things far more taxing I'm sure. I think part of why my 'thriving' score is so high now is that I have very low expectations of myself – keep things reasonably clean, keep the kids safe and mildly taught/entertained, and make some food once in awhile. And shower & get ready about 50% of the time. If I get those things done, I indulge in a nap every day and call it good 🙂
Expectations are KEY! I think I will adopt some of yours! 🙂
Thriving in a perpetual state of survival. 🙂 I can so relate to this…