. . . is that you have to deal with your mom’s emotions every time you move on to the next phase.
I’ve never had a child “graduate” preschool before. My poor guy is stuck reassuring me as I pull him close on the sofa and hold his soft cheek in my hand. For one minute, tears stream down my face as I hear him say, “It’s okay, Mom. Chase will go to preschool next. And you’ll always have Quinn.” (As if he thinks she’ll be a baby forever.)
What triggered my momentary breakdown was the photobook his preschool teachers gave us. The first photo was taken on his first day, when he was barely three years old. The second photo was taken nearly two years later.
Where did that chunky, innocent-hopeful-nervous face go? It seems like I blinked only to have it replaced by that slim face, that self-assured smile.
Moments like those remind me that we really are raising them just to let them go, and when I think about how I am a quarter of the way done raising Trenton, I want to grab his little hand and keep him at my side—just as he is—forever.
It’s scary, letting them move ahead. And this is only preschool. 🙂
What phase of motherhood are you in? Have you been through any big transitions? For the more experienced moms out there, which one was the hardest? (I’ve got to gear up!)
I’m feeling like I’m nearing the end as my son announced that he’s preparing to propose to his girlfriend. All the stages so far have been wonderful – but it’s how you look at it. I remember my son promising me he would stay 5 years old forever and I was darn happy with that promise because that is a pretty wonderful age. We can fall in love with a stage and scramble to hang on to it and mourn its passing, or we can see how awesome our children are in how they are growing. Pre-school is fun and school age is exciting and 12 year olds pass the sacrament and wow is that awesome to watch and teenagers show that they’ve really been listening as they start to make some decisions and gain a bit of independence and then they go off to college and hopefully missions and really bloom. It’s all so amazing that we can experience it.
I always always get excited whenever Kennedy passes a milestone like that. I never feel sad and wish for her to stay how old she is forever. I wonder what’s wrong with me! So far (she’s 8 now) every new little step towards growing up just keeps getting better and better. I think I’m bound to reach a point pretty soon where I start getting all nostalgic though, then, watch out!
I should add that I totally did not feel this way until Trenton turned 4, maybe 4 1/2. I felt like I earned every day up until then! Haha. But then he outgrew the terrible threes and became the sweetest little guy, and I found myself wanting to hold on. So here we are. 🙂 But I think it’s so sweet that you embrace each stage with her. That seems like a healthy way to parent. I’ll have to try it! 🙂
My little guy is only 16 months, but I can easily see how watching your son make the transition from preschool to Kindergarten would be difficult. Difficult in a bittersweet, wonderful way! It is so fun to watch them grow, but at the same time I just want my son to be little forever.
Oh, I am so with you on this one! E just graduated preschool, too, and I nearly “ugly cried” during the video his teacher shared at their graduation. The pictures were so sweet, and the transition of all the kids from their baby faces to confident soon-to-be grade schoolers was amazingly evident (which is a good thing, right?!). Top it off by the song “Let Them Be Little” by Billy Dean, and I was a wreck! It IS hard to let go. I think what makes this transition the hardest is that we’re letting them leave our home (or the preschool WE got to hand pick for them!) and with that comes a major shedding of their innocence. Up until now I’ve been able to control most of what he has been exposed to, and now I know that he’s going to see, hear and experience some rougher things. Of course he has to go through that to be prepared for life and all its ups and downs, but it’s hard to see them grow out of that innocent stage when they are all “ours.” I’m having to learn to embrace my children’s growth and love Marcella’s comments. I’m trying to trust more in something shared by a lady I really admired in Oregon, a mother of three boys who shared her testimony just after her son turned 12 and had gone to the temple for the first time to do baptisms and passed the sacrament. She said, “I keep thinking that it can’t get any better than this, but then it does! It just keeps getting better.” She shared how full of joy and pride she felt in those big moments, and I try to remember that my heart can only get fuller as my children grow and progress. How’s that for a novel-long comment?!
I love that advice from your friend, and I’m going to hang on to it too – the idea that it only gets better. Do you read the blog 71 Toes? Her oldest is 16, and she makes every stage sound pretty great. I always find that encouraging.
Haha, I was the same way at preschool graduation. I was trying really hard not to cry right there, big time. I managed to just get teary and then save the ugly cry for on our couch later, when I looked through the picture book. 🙂
I can never get enough of long comments, so always feel free! Love ya!
So sweet! That picture on the right totally looks photoshopped. But he is so cute! Can’t believe he’s so old!
I don’t think I’m going to handle any milestones well either. I’m already nervous for when Sierra has to go to nursery! And we left her at the child care at the gym the other day and it was the longest 45 minutes of my life. 🙂
That picture looks photoshopped because it’s a picture of a picture! haha
I’m going to need to hear more about Sierra’s first gym childcare experience! Talk soon!
He sure is a handsome little man! 😉
I can definitely relate. Only, for me, my poor “only child” definitely gets all of my emotions without no one else to “share” them with. And by the time I have another one, {Lord willing, I’ll have another}, it’ll be like having another “older” child all over again. Maybe… Ha!
Regardless, we’d all do well to soak up these days, but hold our kids up to our heavenly Father with an open hand, trusting Him with their lives.
I don’t think I ever really considered milestones as such. But the hardest for me has been having both my kids (probably your age!) living so far away from home that I only get to see them once or twice a year. It’s definitely a growing experience when you don’t have a choice but to let go and let God take care of them without your help. 🙂
I had the same experience today, Erica. It was my daughter’s last day of kindergarten, and her school played a slide show during the awards ceremony, starting with a photo of the kindergarten class on their first day back in August. I couldn’t believe the pudgy baby face before my eyes – so much younger than the grown-up school girl I brought home with me today. It happens so fast. They blossom and change, and day by day we don’t notice it so much, but when I look back on this school year, it’s been a tremendous year of growth. For me, too. My mentor moms tell me the next 12 years will fly just as fast. I can hardly comprehend it.
We’re about to start high school. My daughter is a woman. I’ve been contemplating what it’ll be like when she sits behind the wheel for the first time. Sometimes it feels like me “raising her” is done and now it’s up to her to make good choices. I’m quite proud of where she is in her personal development right now. She’s got a great confidence about her. I’m fearful that high school will crush that! Here’s to the next 4 years… Wish me luck!