Last year, I was surprised at how often I referred back to my post on the nuggets of wisdom that stuck with me in 2013. Documenting them was the perfect way to make sure those little lessons became a part of me—for longer than that one year.
2014 was full of learning for me, so I want to remember these takeaways. (And not be doomed to repeat them. 🙂 Like I mentioned a year ago, I love how it’s sometimes just a random line you read or heard somewhere that makes an impression and helps you become a better person.
Feel free to share YOUR 2014 takeaways in the comments!
1. Conflict vs. collusion
Conflict is something that happens to us, whereas collusion describes two active participants. I picked this up in The Anatomy of Peace
2. Tradeoffs Are Not Negative
“Essentialists see tradeoffs as an inherent part of life, not as an inherently negative part of life. Instead of asking, ‘What do I have to give up?’ they ask, ‘What do I want to go big on?'” More takeaways from that awesome book here and here.
3. “Choose discomfort over resentment”
This is Brené’s mantra (yes, we’re on a first-name basis now) when she knows she needs to say no to something. Or, as an essentialist would say, when she needs to make a tradeoff. In my experience, resentment is destructive to relationships, so when saying no means avoiding that, I can get on board. The Power of Vulnerability
4. Play is the feeling of being “outside of time”
After learning about Stuart Brown’s research on play, I played more this year than I have since childhood. (Or maybe college. 🙂 It’s been foundational for my mothering and my path to wholeheartedness.
5. Wonder is everywhere. Dwell in it.
I’ve talked about it twice on the blog, but this TED talk helped me believe in magic again—and be more comfortable dwelling with my kids in an imaginative space. (Instead of worrying about lying to them.) I wrote more about it in this post—Kids: The Intersection of Truth and Lies. Love.
As I rounded up my takeaways for the year, I realized I had written about all but number one. Thank you guys for being my sounding board and for doing life right alongside me! I gain so much solidarity (does that make us sound like a fraternity??) from you all, and I hope you feel it too! Here’s to another year full of growth!
PS. FINALLY, some pictures that actually look like winter! Thank you, Utah Christmas trip. But we’re back by the Bay again. More beach photos likely coming soon. 🙂
YES and AMEN to number 2. 🙂 It reminds me of the “You can do anything, but not everything” quote that floats around Pinterest!
And that second photo . . . wow. Stunning and frame-worthy! It makes me want to visit Utah.
I love all of these! 🙂 I really love Anatomy of Peace. I wish everyone would read that book! But regardless, the concepts in it are just so helpful. Thanks for sharing these!
Thanks, Rach! I had no idea you had read this until I mentioned it at some point. I’m admittedly getting through it a bit slowly (on audio), but I really love the concepts too. Love you!