I unlocked my neighbor’s door and stepped inside her dim apartment, a place that instantly transports you back to 1979.
“Gladys?” I called out.
“I’m in bed!” she answered.
I walked down the hall and turned the corner to see my 85-year-old neighbor patting down her wispy gray hair.
She rolled her eyes in the direction of her legs and said: “I can’t get out of bed. The paramedics will be here soon. Will you call my daughter?”
She paused and then added, “And bring me a slice of toast?”
I smiled at the way she got right down to the point. Gladys always got right down to the point. I returned to my apartment across the hall and smeared homemade jam on a slice of toast.
As it turns out, that toast was Gladys’ last meal in her apartment; she moved into an assisted living facility after leaving the hospital and passed away not long after.
Sometimes I think about that morning and the honor it was to bring my old friend her last meal at home.
She seemed to know, in the moment, what not being able to get out of bed meant.
She looked around her home with a sense of finality.
But the only things she asked of me? Call her daughter and bring her some toast.
She didn’t ask me to fetch her makeup bag or round up a bra. She was well past fussing over her looks.
She didn’t ask me to hand her the newspaper she read every day or to turn on her favorite political talk show.
She didn’t ask me to open the shades so she could take in the view from the windows one last time.
In an apartment full to the brim of the things she’d collected in her 85 years of life, she simply sat and waited.
When it came down to it, nothing meant more than letting her daughter know she was okay and getting some food in her body to give her the energy to get through the morning.
In the end, it’s always the absolute basics that matter most, which reminds me… to make sure it’s the basics—the essentials—that I’m giving my attention to NOW.
With the holidays upon us, I hope you think of Gladys when your family gathers.
They don’t need you to make everything perfect; they just want the essence of you there with them. Beside them.
The gifts, the food, even the traditions… None of it really matters.
Just focus on the basics—the most essential few.
Happy holidays, my friend!
Love,
Erica
